Is that a laboratory in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?

Early Monday morning I woke, sat up in bed and read for a while. At five past seven it dawned on me that I needed to be at the hospital for 7:30! A mad rush and we made it for eight. Not a problem it seemed; In fact I didn't get seen until 8:30. Along came a doctor and I was asked to remove my trousers, and then my boxer shorts. My privates were then covered witha towel and the doctor went to work. A bit of pain from a local anastheatic followed by a small incision and a pipe, not all that dfifferent froma Hickman line, was inserted about 7cm to left of my tackle and sewn down. Not as bad as I had thought it would be but certainly not good.

A taxi to Seacroft hospital where I was promptly supplied with an egg sandwich and cup of coffee, along with a constant supply of biscuits and chocolate bars whilst I waited and waited and waited for my blood test results. All was fine so i was hooked up to the, rather DIY looking, machine that would seperate my stem cells from the rest of my blood. A nurse sits there with you for the full four hours as they constantly have to monitor what is happening and make slight adjustments here and there to make sure that the maximum number of cells are being extracted. A TV and video was brought over and I watched Cool Runnings. The time actually went fairly quickly.

A taxi back to St. James' and more waiting for the results. When they finally came in I was told there weren't enough (a count of 2.4 and they needed a minimum 3) so I would have to stay in over night. Despite my protesting (and a lot of protesting) they convinced my to stay in over night. I wanted to go home and come back in the morning but apparently this pipe could start bleeding and as it is in a major vein there mould be a A LOT of blood.

The next day same again but this time it took ages to get the results back, and even though it was 99.9% likely that I would have enough cells this time they wouldn't take the pipe out until we got confirmation. At about 5pm we did get the results. 2.7, what a surprise, NOT! so totalled together I have a 5.1 (and minimum 3 needed). So off we go to work removing the line from my groin. A stitch here, a stitch there, and then the doctor puls out the pipe. And pulls, and pulls, this thing is HUGE! The amount of pipe that was in me was unbelievable, it was a good 10cm long and half a centimeter wide! No wonder they didn't let me home, I would have bled to death. Finally I could go home and what was scheduled to be one day turned into two full days with a night in hospital.

Some things I discovered on this little trip:
The St. James' hospital canteen is absolutely diabolical. There is no excuse for food of such a low grade. I'm sure many patients would like a nice place to eat when friends and family come to visit, it would be uplifting to feel like you'd gone out, especially if you are spending a long time in hospital.

Give blood, there service is excellent and they really look after you. I'm trying to convince my girlfriend to become a donor but, like many, is scared of needles. The pain from giving blood is like being nipped on the arm so get over it and do some good!

Become a bone marrow donor. It would mean being hooked up tot his machine for four hours, but the line wouldn't be required as they'd just hook your arms up. I couldn't do that because the veins in my arm are so knackered from chemotherapy anf the flow wouldn't be good enough.

And finally, something I've observed MANY times before. The doctors and nurses drip feed you selected information! I didn't know there was a posibility I would have to stay in over night. I didn't even bring my pyjamas. I was very angry about it. They just assume you will know, or that you don't have any plans. Here's some news for you, my life doesn't revolve around cancer, I also do other things, and therefore I need to know in great detail when treatments and appointments will affect my life.